Ground Hog Day
by Chaotic Demon
Summary: Anyone ever wonder what the host club members will be like in sixty years? Especially if they never progress a grade?


This idea has been milling around in my mind for quite some time. I figured that I should get it written at some point. I don't know if this has come up in the anime yet, though…

Disclaimer: While I would love to own the twins, and more importantly Nekozawa, I don't. Nor do I own the movie 'Ground Hog Day.'

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The sun, much to Nekozawa's chagrin, shone brightly on Ouran High School, bestowing upon it its blessing for the new academic year. Students could be found participating in their usual activities; the basketball club was playing basketball, Nekozawa was trying to hide from the brightness outside, and the host club was entertaining its patrons.

Once again everyone in the host club had failed to progress to the next grade due to plot reasons. Haruhi was a little fed up. After all, she should have been at least a senior by now. However, it seemed that no one else was very concerned about it. Kyoya thought it was good for profits, Tamaki was too wound up in being a good host to care, Hikaru and Kaoru welcomed the additional time to torture 'Dad', Hunny liked the cake he got at the club, and Mori would stay wherever Hunny was. Haruhi sighed. She was quite possibly the only one who actually wanted to graduate.

"Haruhi, what's wrong?"

The cross dresser blinked and looked up to see her customers watching her anxiously. Apparently she had zoned out long enough for her clients to notice. She grinned and sheepishly scratched the back of her head. "Sorry. I was just thinking."

"About what?" one of the girls asked. The crowd around her, which had grown to include every other host and their customers except for Tamaki, gave a murmur of assent.

"C'mon, Haruhi," began Hikaru.

Finishing his brother's sentence, Kaoru added, "Tell us."

Haruhi blinked in confusion. Why was everyone suddenly so interested in what was going through her mind? "It's nothing. Really."

By now the crowd had caught Tamaki's attention and the King waltzed over, his customer's trailing behind him. He struck a pose beside Haruhi which made a good number of the girls in the room swoon. "Haruhi dear," he regally declared, "Tell your beloved Dad what's wrong! I shall be your confidant and -"

Recognizing where this was going, Haruhi quickly determined the best course of action. She gave him a deadpan expression. "No."

Tamaki froze in shock. The rose-filled background cracked and fell to the ground in pieces while her refusal echoed in his mind. In an instant he had launched himself onto Kyoya in tears. "Mom! Our daughter won't tell me what's wrong with her!" he sobbed.

Kyoya didn't respond verbally, which of course sent the blonde into his usual position in the corner. He did, however, send Haruhi a look which promised a doubled debt if she did not cooperate. She sighed in resignation before speaking. "Am I the only one who finds it strange that no one's graduated or moved up a grade in at least two years?" Everyone sans Tamaki, who was still in his corner, was giving her an odd look. "I mean," she continued, "What if we're still in the same grade in sixty years?" Everyone looked thoughtful for a moment, imagining the scenario.

_It was a fine spring day, perfect for a nonexistent graduation. The senior citizens hobbled as fast as they could towards their classes, undeterred by the lack of youths on campus. In an unused music room the infamous Host Club met to discuss the current state of affairs. Hunny sat sleeping on the sofa as Mori, still in good shape for his age, stood looking out the window. Hikaru and Kaoru knocked their canes together while discussing how best to trick Tamaki, who had wheeled himself over to his corner in dejection, into eating a mixture of strained beets and prune juice. In a separate corner, Kyoya was talking with Haruhi, all the while plotting to charge the various aged students for standing on the lawn. "Haruhi, you have finally managed to pay off your debt. Now we can all finally graduate." The others in the room looked up eagerly or, in Tamaki's case, despairingly. Secretly triumphant, Haruhi turned to walk out of the room forever. However, a seemingly innocent teddy bear on the floor later, she tripped. Her dentures flew out of her mouth and knocked another priceless vase to the ground. Everyone, except Tamaki of course, stared at the shattered remains in horror. Kyoya sighed. "Well, it looks like you have another debt to pay off."_

The sun shone brightly on Ouran High School as the host club and its patrons viewed their possible future in their minds. The birds, singing sweetly just outside the window, were ignored in favor of a collective grimace. In a virtually unanimous subconscious decision the people chose not to think of it anymore and went back to their previous activities. Haruhi let out a defeated sigh and went to rouse the 'King' from his corner.

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That only took me a couple of months to finish… Anyway, tell me what you think in a review, please! 


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